Living in Hope Part 9/10

[guavejuice]

Banner by urugwaj thank you SO much!!


Author:guavejuice
Pairing:Brian/Justin
Gus' POV
Beta:Kim predec2 Can't thank you enough!!!
This is NOT a WIP.
Click here for previous chapters.
Disclaimer:I own nothing but this story.
Comments are love.

- Britin,Over the weekend,-

"How was your final exam, Gus?" Justin asks as I join them in the patio for lunch.

"It was okay," I shrug matter-of-factly.

"The kid's a genius," Dad answers with pride.

"It runs in the family," Justin adds with a contented smirk, passing the salad bowl over to me.

"I'm NOT a kid," I say in protest, giving Justin a meaningful look.

"We know that, Gus," Justin answers calmly.

"You DO?" I answer. I don't mind the fact that Justin OR my father already knows about those nights I spent with Matt, but it still feels somewhat uncomfortable to know they talked about it, especially since my current relationship with Matt is pretty much nonexistent now.

"It's okay," I say after a short pause. "It doesn't matter anyway, since we're… it's over now."

Dad seems a bit uncomfortable, fussing a bit too much over his bowl of pasta while Justin seems to be almost choking on his red wine.

"So… Gus," Dad seems eager to change the subject. "Now that your high school years are almost over, what are you planning on doing?"

"I guess I'll have to wait to hear from Brown and Dartmouth. I applied there a couple of months ago, so I’ll have to wait and see. BUT in the mean time I've got a prom to plan," I tell them.

Justin suddenly seems to turn pale as if he's seen a ghost. Dad looks a bit alarmed as he places his hand on Justin's.
I feel the weirdness building up, but I can't figure out what just happened, so I decide to tell them about my plan.

"My friend Allison and I – who co-founded the Gay Straight Student Alliance in school – decided we would like to have our own alternative prom a day before the official prom, and invite all our GSSA friends. And get this – we decided we'd like to have an 80's-themed prom. Cool, huh?" I explain.

"Yeah, very cool," Justin answers, still somewhat distracted. "I'm glad your alliance is doing so well, Gus,” he replies. "In fact, I think we have a box of some of your dad's old stuff, so maybe you can find something there. It's in the attic. We can check after lunch if you’d like," he says.

"Yeah, it would be great, thanks," I tell him, not totally oblivious to the concerned look Dad gives him.

"Do you think it's a good idea, Justin?" Dad asks, and I can detect real angst in his voice.

"It's okay, Brian, I'd love to help Gus. And… I've been planning to get the attic in order for quite a while now, anyway, so this would be a great excuse," Justin adds, sending a reassuring smile to my dad.

I help clear the dishes from the patio table, and after we all go inside the house Dad says he's got some stuff to do in his study as I follow Justin to the attic.

_ _ _ _ _ _

"Here it is, Gus," Justin announces, pointing to a dusty cardboard box in the corner.

"Great! Thanks," I tell him. We both sit down next to the box as I rip the tape off. "So… how come I never hear about your prom? Did you have a theme or anything special? More importantly, did you invite a special someone as your date?" I ask with a smile.

"I invited your DAD, believe it or not," Justin answers, but without the usual spark in his voice.

"No shit! THAT sounds really cool! Come on, tell me more…" I urge him.

Justin stammers, "I…I think I’m going to let you go through the stuff here on your own, Gus. I don't know how much you can find in here, but take your time and feel free to take anything you like. I'll be in my studio, okay?" he turns on his heels to leave the attic.

"Was…Was it something I said, Justin?" I ask with concern, noticing he's not his usual self.

"No, it's okay… you're okay, Gus. I have to finish that piece I started working on a few weeks ago, that’s all. See you later," he responds as he crosses the small space and heads out the door and down the stairs.

I frown, hoping I didn't do anything to upset him too much. Justin had been there for me from the day I had been born, and even though he's rather young I know I can always come to him for support about anything. I hope he knows he can do the same with me, even though I'm his partner's son.

With that thought in mind, I start to rummage through the stuff in the box, hoping to find something that would brighten up my friends’ alternative prom.

I find a few cassettes, which are so worn out that I can't even read my dad's handwriting on them. Long, brown strips of tape hang out from each cassette, and before too long I'm giving up on my attempt to try and untangle them, hoping I might find some other hidden treasures in there. There's an old comic book further down, and even a couple of real photos of my dad when he was about my age, but not much more than that. As I'm about to put everything back and place the box back where I found it, I notice a rectangular object in a faded, white cardboard sleeve of some kind. I take a closer look, and I realize this is a real relic of the past. It's one of those cassettes they used to stick into a video player and watch on their TV screens. Back then they watched everything that way. Home movies, films, everything. Apparently it was quite innovative back then. I smile to myself as I try to figure out how they might have operated those machines they used, but then I gasp suddenly as I notice the sticky tape on it that reads 'Justin's Prom'.
My heart beats like a million miles an hour. I don't know why, but I feel as though I’ve stumbled upon a piece of hidden family history I didn't even know existed. Apparently Justin HAD attended his own prom, and there was even evidence of it on this video cassette, but I have no way of knowing what's inside. By the way both Justin and my dad reacted when I even mentioned the subject, too, I can tell they are not exactly keen on sharing that with me.

I hold this object in my hand for a few moments, contemplating what I should do with it, but then I decide I would take it with me and try to unlock the mystery myself before I ask Justin or my dad about it.

_ _ _ _ _ _

-A few days later, in Allison's room-

"So…Where is it? Can you show it to me?" Ali seems impatient to see the mystery object.

"There's nothing much to see, Al," I let her know as I take the video cassette out of my backpack.

"Oh,” she responds in disappointment. “So how will we know what’s on it, then?"

"I think we should find someone who can convert old video tapes into a more modern format, so we might be able to watch it on our computers and even on our iPad," I tell her as I start to Google search.

"Yes, that might be a good idea, but… I hope it's nothing too… private, you know?" she says, biting her lip thoughtfully.

I frown. I hadn’t really thought about that. “I'm sure it's nothing like THAT,” I reassure her, not quite convinced of it, though. God, I wish I knew what was on it! “All I know is that Justin never told me that he had actually attended his senior prom,” I reveal. “All he told me was that he invited my dad as his date, but he didn’t remember any more than that…" Why couldn’t he remember, though? I suddenly wondered.

Shortly after that I'm able to locate a site for one of those small firms who can convert the videotape for me, and I arrange to meet them the following day. Before I leave, I promise Ali we'll continue with our prom plans tomorrow as well.

Just as I'm walking out of Ali's parent's house my phone beeps.

It's Matt.

I know there's not much I can tell him in a text message, so I answer him back, asking him if we could meet some place to talk face to face.

He tells me he will pick me up and we can drive to that little café in his neighborhood.

I can't say I'm not excited to meet him, but this time I know I must not jump right into bed with him, because as much as I want him inside me right now I also know I want way more than just sex from him, and I’d better tell him that while I still can.

-Later that Day-

He tells me he’s missed me and I know he's honest. I tell him I’ve missed him as well, but that we need to figure out where we're going with that, because I'm not interested in a fuck buddy.

He looks at me and asks me if I'm not a bit too young to settle down.

I look back at him and tell him that I may be young, but that I realized I'm not just interested in fucking around.
He tells me I'm a smart kid.

I tell him I'm NOT a kid, and I mention that I’ve applied to Brown, Dartmouth and a couple of out of state schools I'm interested in attending for the upcoming fall.

He asks me if I would mind staying in Pittsburgh, and points out that there are some rather good schools here.
I tell him it depends, and that I'll have to think about it.

We sit in silence a few moments before he grabs my hand from across the table and lets his fingers draw small circles on the back of my hand.

I tell him I've had a long day, and that I need to head back home.

He offers to drive me back to my mom's house, and as much as I'm trying to object to that tempting offer it sure sounds more appealing than a 50-minute bus ride home.

As he pulls over right at my mom's door step, I let out a small smile and point out that my mom might actually like him. He smiles back and says he would love to meet her, since he didn't have a chance to do that at the fundraiser.

I thank him for the coffee and he asks when he can see me again.

I smile carefully and tell him I'll call him tomorrow.

When I walk back inside and go upstairs to my room, I feel quite proud of myself and I decide that I like Matt.
Matt can stay.

After all, he made the first move.

TBC…